Posts tagged ‘cosleep’

March 14, 2011

Come And Knock On My Door…

Now that you’ve gotten the theme song for Three’s Company stuck in your noggin’…time for an update on the sleep training.

It is Day 4 of H’s *hopeful* journey towards better sleep.  Day 1 was actually not as bad as we anticipated…we all had no idea what we were in store for.  He cried. I cried. We questioned ourselves – were we being ‘bad parents’? Was this method going to work for him? Would he hate us in the morning?

H had one of the best sleeps he has had ever. In his 21 weeks, while cosleeping with me he would constatly toss and turn, wake for his paci 20-odd times, take up to 2 hours to go down. 

After night 1, in the morning he was happy and wanted to come to us – though not extra clingy which was my other big fear.

Day 2 proved to be much more challenging. Hubby said that Day 1 would have taken H by surprise and he was right. Night 2 was as though H knew what we were trying to do. He cried. Longer than Night 1 😦 Very discouraging and upsetting for us all but we stuck to our guns. He again had a great night sleep (aside: though daylight savings kind of messed everybody up especially when Hubby accidentally set one clock forward when it automatically did so on its own causing Stylinmommy to insanely turn all the lights on at 5:30am like some sort of sociopath thinking it was 6:30 am…FAIL!)

Day 3 was so far, our best experience.  Though he still cried (and Stylinmommy basically had a panic attack and almost decided to can the whole affair) he slept for the longest time with the least wakeups and woke up happy and rested the next morning. 

Having a camera set up so we could see him definitely made it easier since in between bouts of crying he would stop, smile, look around and seem completely normal. Not having that visual reassurance would have made me cave a thousand times over.

Anyhoo – the title of the post relates to our living situation.  Trying to sleep train while living in a condo is totally the pits.  Before this whole episode started Hubby and I agreed to just go for it – Explain what we were doing so they wouldn’t call the cops, buy the neighbours some earplugs and a giftcard and hope for the best.  We know we are doing what is right for our family and our child after having tried everything else.  Being cranky and dangerously exhausted parents and baby wasn’t helping anybody.

Having said that, when you have a Level 10 screamer of epic proportions on your hands, you really start to question if you have made the right choice and if your neighbours hate you. You wonder if you will find a hate note pinned to your door.  You lay awake not only distressed because of your child wailing but also because of the fact that you live mere meters away from others.

Well nobody knocked on our door…(we did hear some door slamming around 5am when H woke up and couldnt settle back to sleep)  But the whole sleep training experience is made all the more stressful and draining when you are super-conscious of being a pest to others.  

The one thing keeping us on track is that we *hope* after a few days/weeks of the torturous noise, everybody will be the better for it.

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March 11, 2011

No Baby No Cry…til tonight

I am prefacing this posting by saying that I understand CIO is super controversial and I’m prepared for the inevitable onslaught of comments.

The latest visit to our pead (who by the way, is excellent, thanks for the referral M!) resulted in some new stats for H: 20 weeks old, 19.9 lbs, 27 inches tall and so far, healthy as a bull!  Great news and the Hub and I were pretty psyched about it.

Dr. G asked about his sleeping habits and I proceeded to unload on her the strange schedule we have fallen into.  Naps during day are fine, however he takes a nap around 6pm when we try to get him to bed in his crib and then is awake until 9 or 10 and has a hard time falling asleep!  We have tried moving his bedtime to earlier/later and its always the same deal.

As you other mamas out there know – every baby is different and different things work at different times.  Just when you think you have it all figured out, everything changes!  It’s a constant moving target as one of my wise friends said once.

H has gotten much better with naps.  He will take a decent nap (anywhere from between 40 min to 2 hours) a few times a day in a rough schedule.  However he is absolutely addicted to his paci.  He doesn’t use it at all during the day but needs it to fall asleep like a crack-fiend needs his next hit.  He lunges towards it with the ferocity of a lion attacking his first meal after a winter fast.  Sometimes his eyes roll back into his head in a fit of ecstasy once the faux-nipple hits his mouth.

I was one of those people who, before having a babe, swore i’d never let my child use a pacifier. Oh how naive. Once that screaming babe had us at our wits end, Hub stuck a paci in his mouth around week 2 and ever since he has been a suck-monster.

Having said that – he will fall asleep with not too much ado nowadays.  The problem comes during the night – he is constantly waking up when paci falls out and needing to be ‘plugged’ in again.  This has resulted in cosleeping with moi while Hub sleeps on the couch.  He is completely dependent on the paci to get to sleep and to stay asleep. 

I’ve read Pantley, Weissbluth, Ferber and countless blogs and forums online.  We have tried the No cry method but to no avail – the constant picking up/putting down only aggravated H to the point of hysterics.  The patting and shushing didn’t do much to settle him either.

Once Dr. G confirmed that he is healthy, gaining weight fine and yes – let him cry it out – Hub and I have decided to give it a go starting tonight. 

I am definitely nervous – the longest we have let him cry without going to him has probably been 5 minutes and it felt like an eternity.  We are both loving, caring parents so I don’t want to be accused of being ’emotionally unavailable’ by letting him cry. That is a load of bullcrap IMO.  The hope is that we are giving him the tools to be able to soothe himself to sleep which – we hope – will result in him getting a better nights sleep instead of the fitful and restless sleeps he has now.

The goal is not to shut the babe away so that we can have a relaxing evening to ourselves – we are doing this in the hopes that he will be better rested overall.  I’m hoping this will carry over into helping him with car rides (currently if his paci falls out while driving he wails like the world is ending, as soon as I pick him up he is all smiles!)

Anyhoo – would love to get your experiences with CIO, sleep training or cosleeping stories!

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